4/6/17 As we sang happy birthday to our baby girl who was turning 4 and recorded the memory on my iPhone 6plus, I couldn’t help but think about how hard and sad and hurtful it would be to look back on this very moment in a few years when she’s gone. Only a week before had we lost our beloved 14 year old dog Snow so forgive me for my pessimistic mindset. She was a fluffy white Bichon whose spirit animal could have easily been a bear. I had only known snow for five years. My partner and her mother already had a dog when I moved in. Snow was courageous and protective and so loving. If you asked her to dance she would get up on her hind legs… for the right treat of course. And, if you asked for a hug she would tilt her head to the side and lay it across your chest. Snow was amazing. My partner has taken the loss hard. When snow fell ill it took all of us by surprise. We’re dealing. She will truly be missed. We now have one dog. She’s a 4 year old Akita mix. As we celebrate her birthday we also celebrate the life of her playmate, our friend, and companion. I wallow in thoughts of loss and for that reason we celebrate life.
This particular post is one that I have struggled with. I toggled my brain in search of the perfect audience, someone I care about or just someone that I really want to read my work. And as easy as I thought it would be… Nothing! But after many moments of feeling defeated by this topic I sat next to the very audience I am going to dedicate this to. My dog “Rain”
She is a one year old Akita mix. A true gentle giant. But I’ve noticed over the last month or so my gentle giant is missing her best friend. With the consumption of school, work, and now focusing more on my writing, what we like to call “play play time” has become very slim. I find myself shooing her away or putting toys down to focus on something that at the moment seems like it can’t wait.
But it’s the days where school work and even writing become too much for me and too overwhelming that Rain can sense my exhaustion. And she meets me at the door, or waits for me in bed when I make my way up the steps. On these days she’s reminding me that no matter what she’s there to comfort me.
And the times when I’m rushing in the morning and barely have enough time for a full walk and I’m forced to take her in the back yard instead, she still lay back flat on the couch or stands tall at the door and watches me leave. She barks every time I go near the door to start my day in the morning and sometimes it’s like she’s saying,
“Hey, you’re leaving now, today may be rough but when you get home I’ll be at the door tail swinging and tongue hanging just for you!”
So, to my beloved dog Rain. You’re one of my best friends. And when life is weighing me down you lick my face and make it better. I appreciate your loyalty and your protection. I know that things have been rushed and hectic lately but I promise all the hard work and effort mommy is putting into her success will all pay off with all the “play play time and “squeaky” you can imagine.
You’re not just a dog. You’re family and a friend. Your consistency inspires me. I love you Rain-Rain!